Tuesday, November 23, 2010

A few vows go a long way...sometimes anyway

Once upon a time, long ago, way before iPods and skinny jeans were on the scene, people got married once and if they had the misfortune of having to do it again, they generally had a different leading bride/groom.

In the past month or so, my unhealthy appetite for all things tabloid has highlighted a pattern that was originally inherent in Hollywood couples, but has somehow trickled-down to us mere mortals...

Renewal of Wedding Vows

I get the "appropriateness" of renewing your vows when you've been together for, let's say over 20 years. After that long, you definitely need a bit of a vow refresher, enough time has passed for you to actually forget what y'all had sworn to do for eachother in the original binding contract, lol

Heck, in this case the aging couple have both probably defaulted on a few of their original vows, so setting the tone for the next 20 years together and reaffirming their love with a "renewal of vows" ceremony, sounds pretty reasonable to me.

What i don't get is couples renewing their vows on a yearly basis (yes Heidi Klum and Seal) or every five years etc I get that things go down in a marriage, where as a way of moving forward you see renewing your vows as a way to do this. But ummm, from what i hear, marriage is hard work and you're guaranteed a few spats on a yearly basis, so from a savings perspective, it may not be in everyone's interests to have ANOTHER ceremony to prove that you're still in it, to win it.

The original vows covered that bit quite thoroughly...well in my humble opinion anyway.

Holla in your comments your thoughts and experiences!


In other news:

How to spot your colonial roots: Nothing like a Royal Wedding to ressurrect any colonial roots you may have lingering about. When i heard our dear Kate (yah, that Catherine-Catherine business is NEVER gonna catch on missy) had finally got Wills to put-a-ring-on-it....a bloody rock of a ring, at that, my joy was momentarily eclipsed by the stark realisation that I would now never be the Queen of the Commonwealth.

Friends sympathised with me (the good ones anyway), the others told me to stop smoking what i was smoking. I was advised by some that Harry was a better catch than Wills (seeing as he's already got a penchant for Zim girls) and Him didn't know what the fuss was about, as he assumed I already knew i was seeing a prince *insert eyeroll*

To mollify my sense of loss, instead i will start planning the viewing session for the royal gathering and celebrate with my colonisers on this momentous occasion :-)

38 days and counting: The year is winding down, they're fewer cars on the road, people are burnt-out and can be found talking to themselves in office corners.

I'm kind of done with 2010, i barely remember the first half of the year...then again the year hadn't started until the Fifa 2010 World Cup right, lol. The second half has FLOWN by and chocker block full of change and progress.

I would like to dedicated my prayers for 2011 to the people and nation of Haiti, because if there's every been a people or a place that needs a break in the year to come, it's Haiti.

Chickens, as sluggish and impatient as we are to move on and embrace the new upcoming year , lets make the last few days of the year count for something....and yes, that is my inner cheerleader talking :-P

Stay blessed and motivated.

V x


ShonaVixen said...

Too excited to even read this post...Vimbai sha-a thanks for posting this...feels like my first sip of Eggnog latte for this season....you sip so quickly because you've waited all year long for it! So yes your spot is my blog-eggnog latte..LOL..ok let me go and read this post!!

Anonymous said...

I also don't get the annual renewing of wedding vows, I don't see why you need to consistently tell the public that you are still going strong. I'm not really interested in Katie and William, unless they of course declare it a public holiday, then I'll be singing Katie & William all the way!

ShonaVixen said...

Ok one part I don't get the whole constant reassurance (I keep thinking is it for them or for the public) and the other part I say heck let them do what they see fit on their wedding anniversaries, if they want to have a 'vow refresher' every year so be it..

The royal wedding : its on a Friday, so like @MBLS I'm so hoping its a bank holiday...I don't care much for the wedding (but we both know I will be watching that stuff on tele!) Talking of that ring - why are people going out to buy the QVC replica?why?...sigh...

chridam said...

I think if a couple agree at a conscious level that the purpose of a relationship is to create an opportunity, not an obligation — an opportunity for growth, for full Self expression, for lifting both lives to their highest potential, for healing every false thought or small idea one has ever had about another, and for ultimate reunion with God through the communion of two souls — if couples take that vow instead of the vows they've been taking — the relationship has begun on a very good note!

kookie said...

I'm going to surprise y'all because if anyone can't abide things like constant vow renewals it would be me right? Wrong...well kinda...I think on your anniversary you should have a little party (without party planners and a huge do/flock of people). To a) celebrate how far you have come and b)re-commit to the vows you made c)make some new ones just for you and him based on what's gone on in the marriage during the year. It should be the one day in the year you get to give your marriage a boost.

In fact I would forfeit birthday celebrations and gifts for this one commitment from future hubby. I think like valentines day and other celebrations the anniversary has become "here's your gift, I still love you because I remembered and I spent money on you".

shonavixen said...

just came to say its official - we get an extra bank holiday thanks to the Royal wedding...lol...

Karanga Chic said...

William and Waity Katie will end up in divorce court in seven years. But then again they are uber boring so they might go the distance. The Eva and Tony split has made me cynical and I swear to gosh if I hear Jingle Bell Rock one more effing time, I'm gonna jingle bell box someone's ears. I'm definitely felling Grinchy McScrooge this year.

Tendayi said...

I'm just glad your back...vow renewal all the way..if it means honeymoon renewal ;)

Kate and Wills eh *shrugs* I just hope taxpayers realise they get to pay for the wedding and they are not even invited...

Funms-the rebirth said...

quiet vow renewal....well an intimate celebration with my husband and i, and he better buy me big gifts too to remind me of how much he loves me....hehehehehe

Vimbai said...

@Shona: That's just it, the constant assurance it reeks of all things insecure. I get it if you renew the vows informally, in front of eachother or close friends. Asi/but these extravagant vow renewals, complete with 12 bridesmaids, horse & carriage are just unecessary man.

PS Eish, i would like to know which demographic is buying up those QVC replica rings...coz that's just sadness at its best, smh.

@MBLS: Look at you, scheming for a public holiday (this includes you too Shona), saka now they've confirmed that you Mud Islanders have an extra bank holiday, whatchu gonna spend it doing?

@Chridam: Very nicely said, i got shivers whilst reading your comment and had this crazy compulsion to scream "Amen" at the end of it. I think vow renewal has definitely become some sort of lip service...

@Kooks: Errr yah, you surprised me. I think you're getting soft in your old age, i kid, i kid :-P

Let's not be too hasty to relinquish other gift giving anniversaries, *ahem*. But seriously, I'm really admonishing those who must have a 500people strong vow renewal event on the regular.

However, if its you and hubby, having sundowners on the deck, whispering your commitments to eachother while some Ella Fitzgerald plays in the background and you wear a flowly dress...ah, then you have my blessing!

Karanga Chic: Hezvo!!! The realist is in the hizzay :-) Lets not start plotting K & W's demise, tsk tsk. Ah, and now you're beefing with Xmas, ka ka ka, i give up!

@Tendayi: I'm glad to be back. Err and according to Sky News, the wedding bill will be paid with private funds (errrr, i just happened to catch that bit on the news, la la la).

@Funms: Exactly! A nice quiet affair..with pressies, very simple innit :-)

Karanga Chic said...

@Vim lol!! I was in a really bad mood when I wrote that. There is this house down the road from my crib here in AB and it is insane. Even my Grinchy McScrooge heart was melted. It is actually the brightest house in the world for Christmas and the owner pays $6000 a month for electricity alone for the two months the lights are up. It is sicker than sick and I wish I could send everyone a photo of this house. It will so cheer you up oh and also this kid called Keenan Cahill youtube him, will put a smile on your face. K&W are just so dry, that is all lol.

Anonymous said...

The GREATEST blog I have read all month???

-My regards,

Anonymous said...

Simple and sweet. I’m thinking of starting another blog or five pretty soon, and I’ll definitely consider this theme. Keep ‘em coming!