Monday, November 09, 2009

The One About The Naartjie & The Bar

When I received the SOS sms from a friend calling for drink companions on Friday evening, I responded in real-time. The last two days of last week were a mess, a horrible mess: the kind of days that only copious amounts of alcohol can shed in good light.

Being the cheap date that I am, it was no surprise that I was extremely tipsy within consuming half a glass of something pink and bubbly. Geez we had fun. Hysterical giggles and random outbursts from us kept the bar crew greatly entertained. Our spoken language skills had deteriorated to that of a verbal dyslexic or as Zimbo’s would call it, chopes**! The chopes were so priceless I found myself tweeting them, good times.

It was round about this time that I spotted them. A varying display of fruit splendidly displayed at the back of the bar counter. Before you could say, “Vim, get it together we’re in a posh bar” I’d asked a rather bewildered waiter to hand me a naartjie* and proceeded to nonchalantly peel it, right there, by the bar.

Eh, yah. Not a good look.

Thankfully, my friends realising the consumption of carbs was long overdue, proceeded to usher me to the dining part of the establishment before I asked for more fruit, lol.

Luck would have it that the restaurant was offering delicious Bombay Gin cocktails, suffice to say that as we had started our drinking escapades early, the night was but a baby by the time my head hit the pillow.

Moral of the Story: Ask for Naartjies to take home instead J

*Naartjie: I think they’re called Tangerines in other parts of the world.
**Chope: The erroneous pronunciation of words mostly, but not always limited to, those found in the English Language. See attachment below for other examples (hope you can read it, i can't seem to make it any bigger)

Aphrodisiac, my bum: There are certain foods that I’ve never understood the hype about. Cavier is one of them and I’ve recently added oysters to the list.

I was force-fed my first and last oyster this past Saturday at the over-priced Johannesburg Food and Wine Festival. What’s so great about slurping back what feels like a chunk of snot sprinkled with Tabasco sauche?! Seeing as I am not a fan of mussels and oysters are first cousins with the mussel family, I should have seen it coming.

Don’t get me started on figs!

Pretentious food I believe in: Escargot/snails - give me those any day! Oh and lobster…and duck/quail what what.

As for aphrodisiac type foods that get you in a saucy mood…well, let’s just say some of us don’t need food to get us in that particular mood…am just saying, lol.

Seriously though, what’s constitutes “sexy” or “sex inducing” food anyway? Holla in the comments.

Quentin kani: Caught the much talked about latest offering by Quentin Tarintino, “Inglourious Basterds” and was speechless. The man knows about gore and doesn’t shy away from disturbing scenes. In the same breath, he can draw out the suspense in a scene to a point at which as a viewer you want to scream, “Let me out of my misery already!”.

Inglourious Basterds was Quentin’s take on how Hitler and his cronies met their demise. I suspect Jews everywhere are cheering at his version of what went done in the end. Kudos to him for re-writing history and abstaining from the temptation of making it a clich├ęd happy tale that Hollywood is fond of churning out.

Check it out if you haven’t had a chance, and if you have seen it, what did you think?

Other mentionables:

- I watched and re-watched Rhianna's interview with Barbara Walters and there was something a little off about it. Since the beat down incidence i've been solidly Camp RiRi and still am, but after catching the interview, i really am questioning her motives about finally speaking out. She seemed mostly defensive and kinda reluctant, like someone had put her up to it. Mmmmmmh.

What you think?

PS I love how when people want to look all respectable, they wear turtle-necks, lol - hilarious.

- Goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Chelsea - that's all i am saying, lol!


Seven Mondays to go till this year is out, can you believe it!

Have a fun one chickens!


V x


munhu said...

had a little chuckle at the remembrance of chopes - Kudzi Marudza on your all hit radio - Radio 3 back in the day was a chope master of note - "lowsst" in the Highlands area is a bleck lebridor beeech answering to the name of Roowjah ( lost in the Highlands area is a black labrador bitch....Roger )
as for aphrodisiacs - I find that the scent of a woman is most sure aphrodisiac I know...not just her fragrance but the way her fragrance mingles with the heat of her body and takes on that twist that only her body can give a fragrance that distinct top note unique to only her...when worn right no fragrance ever smells the same on a woman....

ShonaVixen said...

CHELSEA ROCKS!!! I watched the game with a Liverpool fan who painfully endured me showing off!!

LOL @ chopes and @ munhu thanks for that Kudzi Marudza one!!!aaah memories!

I like oysters..but as for them being an aphrodisiac its never worked on me... like u said some of us dont need food anyways ;)
M not a fan of snails though
Love,love,love duck!!
Watched the Rihanna interview last @ the turtle neck thing coz its so true..she had a turtle neck, Chris wore a bow tie!

PS: M singing naartjie, naartjie rotten egg, rotten!!

Deedza said...

Totalling PWL at everything you just wrote and am so speechless about the naartjies vim, really??
But then again better u picked up the naartjies than the bartender... I once tried that and it was great we were writing each other little notes in the receipt book,he was plying us with free drinks, he said he would call when he get off he never did.. Thank the heavens he didnt!!

Your comment on turtlenecks is so true... I have a visa interview today and i wore a turtleneck in the hope i would look more respectable and professional loling!! hope it pays off and the Frenchies give me access

Myne Whitman said...

Naartjies, from the peeling guessed what they were. So you have no head for the bubblies eh? LOL.

Food that puts my SO in the mood. anything hot with chilli pepper and ginger in it. Mine is strawberries and melted chocolate or bananas and cream. You get the idea...

Inglorious basterds...Quentin is a master. I watched that the week it came out cos I'm a fan.

Finally, down with Chelsea and Man U forever!!!!!!!!! LOL

Lu said...

Inglorious Basterds is a fantastic movie...I normally dont watch movies at the cinema because for lack of a better description..I am a jew...But this one, I was definitely in the lineup for tickets..Of course on a tuesday because i am a firm believer of judaism...Anyway, the Jew Hunter played by Christoph Waltz..Wow..

Rihanna's interview, I also found to be a tad suspect...She spoke a little too well for someone who had been beat down...

CHELSEA....I dont even want to talk about that...Glory Glory Man Utd.

And about those fruit items, are the realest female I know...

K said...

hate oysters...what I love are hot spanish doughnuts in winter which are accompanied with a melting pot of chilli chocolate you dip the doughnut in...yuuuum

Fruit in the bar Vee? Ah but you are not too bad Ive heard of people bringing Nando's into the club

As for chopes ... my primary school english teacher said to us "spell Weapon" but she pronounced it "whip-on" needless to say I new to such pronunciation got that wrong.

Vimbai said...

@Munhu: Sha, you are bringing those Kudzi Marudza chopes back man, that's when radio was thoroughly entertaining, lol.

I hear you on the scent thing, honestly, the way they load men's colognes up with pheromones these days, somebody or a group of people are gonna get one day when they get jumped en masse by out of control just saying.

@Shona: Poor Liverpool fan, lol. For real, i'd forgotten about the baby blue bowtie, so spastic.

Now i have "Naartjie, naartjie, rotten egg, rotten egg."

@Deedza: Fingers crossed and bum clenched that you get your visa!

Look @ you flirting shamelessly with the bartender, lol, girl get your free drink on!

@Myne: Iits shocking how zlcohol intolerant i am these days, shocking!

Strawberries and cream...mmmmh! Yummy, now i'm craving some. And i concur, Quentin is a master...a crazy one, but geez, that movie was good.

You Man Utd fans are the worst, the worst! GO CHELSEA!

@Lu; Pamberi/Forward with frugal living! Is Tuesday night the universal 1/2 price movie nights or something?

Exactly, Rihanna didn't look or seem as emotional as i wanted her to be. She was cold man, cold.

The fruit items went down and i'm not that real honey, they don't call me the bourgie chick for nothing (it was the alcohol that drove me to peel a naartjie in a classy bar...thats my story).


@K: What are these spanish donoughts you speak of, the sound yummy...i want.

Nandos in the club, hahaha, i can't judge after all, its Nandos were talking about here.

So K, are you a whip-on of mass destruction, hehehehe.

unwritten said...

Wande Coal is AWESOME and is also rocking my world these days!
Still lovin your blog girl!