Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Wait 'till I get my $ right!

Perusing the CNN Money section before checking in to dreamland does not constitute "light" bed-time reading. Instead i have been having mini panic attacks at 3am in the morning about how i managing my money.

After reading everything under the sun about how to manage your money, where best to put your money, whether to save and clear debts or clear debts before saving, i still feel relatively clueless.

One of my girl's claims i'm over-reacting and after giving her a run-down of my situation offered some advice...but i feel like i am chasing my tail either way.

Financial advisors charge ridiculous amounts of money to spew forth what you can read up by yourself anyway. I also think they're too detached, i feel like i should trust and know (to a certain degree) the person who's providing me some monetary direction.

If only Suze Orman was my BFF and i could interrogate her over tea *sigh*

Bottomline: I need a clear and concise monetary plan. My end goal is not to become a paper chaser, but to use the little i have is the great enabler after all.

I'll figure it out i guess....but in the meantime; what's the best money advice you've ever received, read or given?


Taking the plunge: As a good friend of mine so delicately informed me, " you need to stop making excuses and grab life by the fu*ken horns."

Eish tough words to hear, but not something i did't already know. So no more ummming and hmmming...appointments have been made, meetings have been scheduled, game plans have been drawn up. Will keep you informed as i cross off my to-do-list accordingly

Interesting times.

Just found out i have to go and give a lecture to university students, oh what joy! I can barely remember being a student...okay, now i am lying! I remember it all...the fun parts anyway. Those were simpler times indeed, lol.

Have a great hump day chickens!


V x

Monday, July 20, 2009

Girlfriends, Geese & 67 minutes

When my hairdresser decided to fly the coop, lets just say, that was the straw that broke this here camel's back.

I am well aware that in life there are much bigger problems to contend with than one's hairdresser going missing...war, famine, AIDs, The Recession, retrenchment and halitosis come to mind.

But you know what, i don't care.

Last week was a bad, bad week and the only sliver of hope on the horizon was that i would feel a little more human after getting my hair did. It didn't help that a male co-worker kept calling me out on my bird's nest on Friday afternoon...although, what the state of my hair has got to do with him is another mystery i would solve if i actually cared.

Thankfully, help was at hand from a lovely girlfriend who is the proud owner of flat-iron that is a miracle worker (true story). What was meant to be a hair make-over turned into a counselling session which then became a comfort-food session, after 2 odd hours i was a new person.

Good friends are hard to find...fantastic girlfriends are a bigger rarity.

What's the nicest thing a friend has ever done for you...or you for them?


Goosey Goosey Gander: Got up close and personal with a bottle of Grey Goose on Saturday night. I understand the hype now. My Russian alter-ego, Valushka, even made an appearance (she only emerges when good quality vodka is being consumed - she is a Romanov after all, lol).


67 minutes to save the world: In honour of Madiba's (Nelson Mandela) birthday on Saturday, everyone is being encouraged to dedicate 67 minutes of their time to giving back to the community in honour of Madiba dedicating 67 years of his life in fighting injustice and apartheid in South Africa.

I'm not sure where my 67 minutes will go but can't help but feel that compared to sacrifices made by Madiba and people like him, 67 minutes sounds like nothing in the grand scheme of things.

It's a start i guess.

Happy belated Birthday Madiba!

Where are your 67 minutes going towards?

Happy Monday chickens, catch you on the flip-side.
V x

Sunday, July 19, 2009

Sunday Night Poetry XIV

Flipping through some poetry books i came across Roger McGough's poem, "Contact Lenses". As a contact lense wearer, i find it amusing as i find i straddle two worlds: one of crystal clear clarity and the other of blurry oblivousness.

I loved the play on words with scintillate and "sin till late" in Roger's second poem that i selected. As someone who had a late nite and early morning in the club (again), i can completely commiserate with the fact that the body isn't as youthful as it used to be. No more closing down the club at 6am for me :-)

And the last poem by Stevie Smith reminded me of a time of youthful bliss and carefree romanticism.

Please feel free to share any poems that you love, i am always on the hunt for new material to read and dissect.


V x


Contact Lenses

she leaves them in
until after they have made love.
She likes to see clearly
the lines and curves of bodies.
To watch his eyes, his mouth.
Somenights she enjoys that.

when taken by the mood
she takes them out before
and abandons herself
to her blurred stranger.
Other senses compete to compensate.
Without lenses, blindly accepts her fate.

Roger McGough



I have outlived
my youthfulness
so a quiet life for me

where once
i used to

now i sin
till ten
past three.

Roger McGough



I like to get off with people
I like to lie in their arms.
I like to be held and tightly kissed.
Safe from all alarms.

I like to laugh and be happy
With a beautiful beautiful kiss.
I tell you, in all the world
There is no bliss like this.

Stevie Smith

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Girl Crushes & Male Default Settings

girl crush:
The admiraton one girl has for another.
It could be to do with hair, body, make-up, car, clothes, career, talents, personality etc. Completely non-sexual.

Like i had to explain to my guy friend, a girl crush does not equate to me wanting to hit that! He wasn't convinced, i could already see the R-rated images breezing through his head, men *smh*

Every woman's earliest "girl crush" is more often than not, their mother. When i was young, i was impatient to grow up, i wanted to be like my mum. Walk like her, talk like her and most importantly dress like her. Afternoons after school were dedicated to breaking into my parent's cupboards (their hiding places for their keys were ridiculously easy) and ransacking the closet.

I would try on her shoes, her jewellery, her dresses and her make-up...prance around all afternoon and then put it all back before she got back from work. Unfortunately, she always caught me out, the blue mascara that i would have applied liberally was supposedly extremely waterproof and no amount of scrubbing was going to budge it, hehe.

In high school, i had a girl crush on a girl in the year above me. In my eyes, she was just too cool for school, i wanted to be like her, talk like her...i think i even started styling my hair like hers, which she approved of after nodding at me in one of the hall-ways as i made my way to class.

Since then my crushes are still varied, from female friends and family, blogging sisters (yes, you guys) and over at the larger than life spectrum, people like Sanaa Lathan, Linda Evangelista, Aaliyah, Gwen Stefani, Beyonce occupying that spot at some time or the other. My latest larger-than-life crush is of course, the lovely Michelle Obama.

After winning over Africa in a big way with her and her hubby's trip to Ghana, i can't help but wonder "who doesn't love this woman?". She's everything women try to embody; strong, smart, approachable, styling and eloquent *sigh*

Ladies, who are your current and former girl crushes? Gents, we know you get man-crushes too, so spill!


Ummm, speaking of Obama...

This picture is doing the rounds and proves without a shadow of a doubt that when men have to Look, eish, they will Look, even Mr President of the Free World, Obama.

The look on Sarkozy's face is priceless!

The email i got came with this disclaimer in the body (obviously written by a man):

Good to know Barack is a brother well versed in callpygia (the art and science of female posterior observance) just like the rest of us... and Sarkozy is French so you can see where his gaze is (probably part of French Foreign Policy to get the talent on show when the visitors are around).

So it’s clear when you see a good thing, don’t be shy now... LOOK! – Barack does and he knows the whole world is watching his every move... but when its time to look – forget CNN, BBC, Fox etc.. hell forget Michelle ... it is time to LOOK!

Look at him... he’s got that “Damn it’s fine” look on his face... And Sarkozy has got that “everything is going according to plan, I love how we French showcase our talent” look on his face....


He WILL look... This has got nothing to do with whether he loves you or not, desires you or not... In fact it’s got nothing to do with you... NOTHING... So don’t worry about it. It is what it is...

Holla your thoughts in the comments

Happy Hump Day chickens,


V x

Monday, July 13, 2009

When Peer Pressure Wins The Day

So i have a TV now.

Feels weird.

Walked past the lounge on the way to the bathroom this morning and almost got a bad case of whip-lash when my peripheral vision picked it up. Most people would be startled to notice that their TV is missing, i am startled to see one in the first place.

Then i remembered that the amazing generosity (and disbelief) of a friend is how i ended up with the contraption sitting there.

I should thank Michael Jackson, inadvertently of course, for hooking me up.

You see, on the night of MJ's memorial while most people where watching it live, i was busy moon-walking in my living room waiting for Youtube to upload that ish. I wasn't really bothered with the 45min time lag, but it seems other people were appalled on my behalf.

Shock was expressed when a friend called to find out what i thought of memorial only to discover that i still didn't have a TV. I was then instructed, quite forcefully too, to get my behind to her place and pick up the spare TV she was harbouring there. I just muttered, "Yes m'am" were i could get a word in edge-ways.

After 14 months without one of these bad boys, i am treating it with suspicion, hehe. I am happy to report that i caught my first flick yesterday...a documentary on panda's and it was so refreshing. The plight of the panda's is an emotional stirring one.

It also dawned on me that local TV sucks, and that could explain why everyone has got DSTV/cable. Scrolling through the TV guide, i realised that everything they were showing i had already watched or was like 2 seasons behind, shocking!

I can't help but be saddened that my status as The Girl With No TV has been revoked. I am now just like everyone else :-(

Tis a sad day indeed, the unintentional non-conformist has conformed.


ROFLOL..SMH..LOL...LMAO: I wish i could express to you the sheer hilarity of the South Park episode where Bono is ripped...RIPPED to shreds! Just thinking about it is launching me into fits of uncontrollable giggles.

I haven't laughed this hard since...eish, i can't even remember.

Do yourself a favour, even if you aren't an avid Spleezie follower. Just watch it, promise me, its hilarious.

I am just finished thinking about it...


Am still feeling a little tender from the weekend! Note to self: When well meaning Naija boys start sponsoring drinks in the club, don't try to drink your weight in liquid form! My cheap-date self got too excited and now all i want to do is go home and crawl under the covers.

Have a happy, hydrated Monday chickens!


V x

Friday, July 10, 2009

Friends AND Money: Never the twain should meet

Friends and Money, those two things go together like Reebok sneakers and a Robert Cavalli dress.

Yah, that bad!

Personally, i believe these two things are mutually exclusive events. Obviously there are some exceptions to the rules; like your girl/boy who always hits you back in time, as agreed and if you're lucky, with interest!

But i'm not here to preach about those rare souls, i'm here to talk about The Others.

The Others are those other friends who manage to melt your resolve on not lending money to friends. They convince you that they're good for it. They tell you that your donation is for a worthy cause (rent, medical problems, food etc). You being the kind hearted schmuck that you are, think "what the heck, i will help this friend and get my money eventually." It's a win-win situation right...wrong.

What ensues is a battle of wills! Any of the following situations can occur:

1. Friend is unreachable: phone goes automatically to voicemail and emails are not responded to;

2. Friend says they're still having a cash flow problem even though you could SWEAR she/he was wearing a new coat that's come out from [Insert name of flashy clothes store here];

3. Friend gets all defensive as though you are bothering them...even though it has been 3 mths already since the original transaction; and,

4. Friend fakes a case of amnesia and acts as though no money was ever exchanged to begin with.

In my experience, that person quickly goes from being a friend to a frenemy. That cash you lent them quickly gets written-off as a bad debt...not to mention, overtime so does the "friend"

What experiences do you guys have that have involved friends and money?


The search continues: My search for that "perfect" phoenix tattoo continues! Yes, i know we've been here before, but y'all know i'm too chicken sh*t to get one. Until they actually find a way to numb the area that's being tatted (is that even a word), i will most like not go through with it.

Instead i will content myself with find amazing pics of body art and oooh and ahhh accordingly.

The specimen about is just absolutely gorgeous! I love where its placed and the design. It may be a bit too big and filled in (i like the more stencilled, spirally look) but yah, that item is a show-stopper.

Do any of you possess any show-stopping body art?


Are you Comfortable? Why didn't i know about this song...why? okay probably cause he wrote it and performed it on an album that was released when noone knew who he was. Now i am gonna go in search of all the stuff he's ever done before the flashing lights hit him.

Heard it last night, nearly started crying (eish, i am a sap like that). The lyrics are so bitter sweet, we've all been there.

If you haven't heard it, get a hold of John Mayer's track "Comfortable"it will change your life (not because its by John...but because its helps though that John is the one singing though).

excerpt from "Comfortable"

Our love was, comfortable and
so broken in

I sleep with this new girl i'm still getting used to
my friends all approve, say she's gonna be good for you
they throw me, high fives

She says the bible is all that she reads
and prefers that I not use profanity
your mouth was, so dirty

Life of the party
and she swears that she's artsy
but you could distinguish
Miles from Coltrane

Our love was, comfortable and
so broken in


Chickens, may your weekends be filled with great weather, fantastic company, yummy food, endless drinks and minimal financial expense :-)


V x

Wednesday, July 08, 2009

Oh-bla-di, Oh-bla-da: Final Goodbyes

Life tends to have this annoying ability to gone on.

Some could argue that this inherent trait of life is it's saving grace. There's no time to wallow, no time to get lost in the moment because before you know it, the moment has dissapated like a fart in the proverbial wind...well some moments anyway.

Today it dawned on me that all my MJ mourning needs to stop now. It helped that the DJ on my favourite radio station announced this morning that they'd no longer be any MJ playlist or tributes, after yesterday's Memorial, it is enough now.

And speaking of the Memorial, wow, what a way to go! Thanks to the beauty of YouTube and real-time uploading, i got to see all the key parts. The highlights of the night where:

1. Mariah Carey choking up the first few notes to "I'll be there", asikana/shame;

2. My boy John Mayer's guitar tribute to "Human Nature". Damn, that was amazing. No words, just notes and it still reduced me to about "strumming my pain with his fingers";

3. The wild card of the whole night, Shaheen Jafargholi belting out "Who's Loving You". That boy can SANG! I had heard about how he'd done great things on Britain's Got Talent, but hadn't heard first-hand till last night what all the fuss was about. Like K twittered last night, i hope Joe Jackson doesn't get any funny ideas about signing the boy onto his record label;

4. I was a little annoyed that Usher wore his shade through-out his performance, until i finally got that he was probably doing so to hide his post-crying puffy eyes...i would have still prefered to see his eyes though, it would have made his performance that more sincere; and,

5. Paris Katherine Jackson's speech BROKE me. That little girl did what few of us would have been capable to do at such at time. She also reminded us that 3 kids had lost their Daddy - heart breaking. I was a mess after that speech, a MESS.

The memorial achieved everything that the BET tribute did not. It was the final farewell for his fans, but for his family, their farewells will continue for the rest of their lives.

May God give them the strength to get through it all.

Sonnet II

"Time does not bring relief; you all have lied
Who told me time would ease me of my pain!
I miss him in the weeping of the rain;
I want him at the shrinking of the tide."

Edna St Vincent Millay

On a gloomy, chilly Wednesday morning in Gauteng...sadly, it's business as usual


Have a blessed Hump Day chickens.


V x

Monday, July 06, 2009

On a MUST Know Basis

I don't do suspense...ever! Don't start telling me a story and then abruptly conclude, "Never mind" when you haven't finished what you were originally saying. I will inflict bodily harm until i get the grand finale, scout's honour!

It takes everything in me to read books without flipping to the end to find out how it all ends. Sometimes i'm good and will squirm my way to the end, most often than not, i will just flip to the back of the book and be on some, "Ooooooh, so that's what happens to [insert character's name]" tip.

Don't ever leave me with remote when watching anything suspense related, and this is not only limited to horrors and thrillers. I'm talking comedies, rom-com's, sport (eg the tennis this weekend)....i will even go as far as saying animal documentaries. If there's a squeamish, cringeworthy, nail-biting finish or ohmigosh-are-they-really-gonna-do that moment in any programme i am watching, i will switch channels, much to the annoyance of whomever's sitting in the room with me.

Family members revoked my remote control rights loooooong back, i supposedly can't be trusted :-)

So why am i telling you all this?

Well, because i recently found that i've been short-listed for a competition (that i entered no less than 20 times) for me and two friends to go and see Oprah live in Chicago. Last Friday when i was called with this fantastic news, i was told that i would be told the outcome today.

Today i got the call to tell me.........that me and the other 12 finalists had been invited to a dinner where a draw would take place to determine who goes on the trip.


I was hoping to be put out of my misery by this point...but noooooooooo, i have another 16 days-and-counting of this limbo-like state to put up with.

The good news is that i get more praying time in to ask the Big Man in the Sky to help a sista out. All prayers and good vibes from the blogville family are most welcome to (read: Help a sista out!).

Question: What would your rate yourself on the suspense-o-meter of life, love and all of that?

Never Can Say Goodbye: I'm surprised my neighbours haven't called me out on my constant replay of MJ's hits...or rather, the five MJ songs i actually have on-hand, which probably makes my tribute extremely annoying to those listening in.

I am still in denial stage which makes his song, "Never Can Say Goodbye" very apt.
Sadly, even in death the man doesn't get a moment's rest. His funeral or memorial has become a Grade A Fiasco with an estimated 1 million people attending. What happened to resting in peace and all that? Now tickets are being sold, TICKETS!

So much for him resting in peace :-S


Okay chickens, have a fabulous Monday and keep on smiling...or whinging, whatever makes you happy :-)


V x

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Bad News loves Company

Can you say, "Mass Hysteria?"

Ever since The King saw it fit to kick the bucket prematurely the world has lost it's damn mind! Bad news has always been an inherent component of life but these days, people seem to be actively creating unfounded bad news, just for just!

Take for example yesterday morning; I jump onto Twitter to see that Rick Astley is a Trending Topic. Like the other tweeps, i am a bit confused as to why Rick Astley is a conversational topic...i thought he'd probably made a greatest hits album or something? Turns out that he was rumoured to be dead...a rumour that, surprise surprise, turned out to be unfounded.

Errr, what gives?

I know we're in the middle of a recession and everyone's bummed, i know that people are getting retrenched left, right and centre and everyone's generally bummed out...darn it, i know that MJ has left us hanging, as have a whole host of celebs in the last few days...i know that planes (read: Airbus what-whats) are dropping out the sky at an exceedingly exponential rate...

But do any of the above warrant people making up lies, more specifically, death-related lies?

I think the world needs a hug...a nice big, squishy hug that says, "Hey, you'll be okay, we'll be okay."

We need to spread the light not the darkness here people (wow, i sound like a chirpy, obnoxious cheerleader, lol).

So here's the thing!

I want all of you reading this (yes, even YOU who never leaves a comment) to tell me
what's making you smile today?

It's the little things after all :-)


Who's That Girl? Do you know the UK indie group the Okay, neither did i up until about 90 minutes ago so you're forgiven.

The Noisettes are an indie rock band from the UK who are blowing up with the release of their single, " Don't Upset The Rhythm (Go Baby Go)" off of their second album...its nice and catchy and i'm going to hound the Net for the rest of their stuff.

I am particularly chuffed that the main vocalist is a Zimbabwean chick by the name of Shingai Shoniwa! I love it! Zim mama's around the globe are shaking their head in disbelief that one of their daughters is a singer in a band and broken out of the mould.

She's gives the rest of us outspoken, less-than-conventional African chicas something to celebrate...Individuality, Originality, Creativity with just the right amount of Kick-Ass!

Go Shingai!

Have a Sunshiny day chickens!


V x