Where do I begin? I know you’ve been confused by my absence or rather avoidance during these last few weeks.
The truth is… well, there’s someone else.
I wasn’t looking to replace you, seriously I wasn’t. You and I had had such a good run for the last decade or so. Even during times of judgement, like when my mother found evidence of after my first semester at varsity and demanded vehemently why I bothered with you and that she was convinced that you were merely “stringing” me along & I should replace you with something of more substance (read: more material per square centimetre).
I defended you and spoke of how you delivered me from the horrors of Visible Panty Lines (VPL) and frumpiness at the tender age of 18.I wasn’t the only one who loved you though, you were so popular that even Sisquo wrote a song about you
Nevertheless, I had my frustrations with you that I skilfully hid from those near and dear to me. You weren’t always the most comfortable companion, can I be more candid and go as far as saying you could be a right pain in the ass at times.
This can’t be all that surprising to you, you must have seen this coming a mile away. Now I think about it, our relationship had no long-term future. The fact that I refused to sleep with you should have set off some alarm bells!
Like I said earlier, I met someone else. If I was to be honest, this isn’t as recent development as you probably believe. But even back then, you were my mainstay; those flings meant nothing, merely an outlet for my quarter life crisis and need for change.
Nevertheless, a week ago, I was minding my own business and doing a spot of window shopping when I walked into La Senza who were having a fantastic sale. I couldn’t resist. As I reached out for you, my staple, the sales lady pointed out that the French Knickers (FK) would be more to my liking. Ordinarily, I wouldn’t have listened, but they looked so cute. I promised myself that I would only buy them this once, what harm could be done.
Two weeks later and this is were we find ourselves…semi strangers. FK’s have introduced me to a new way of comfort and sensuality. This is no longer a casual dalliance or school girl crush. I’m in it for the long-term…I am so sorry.
I know we’ll still see each other from time to time; we have too much history to part ways so coldly and completely. After all, we can still be friends :-)
No hard feelings,
Happy Hump Day hukus (chickens)