Friday, September 26, 2008

Primping + Preening = Pain in the Posterior

Picture the scene:

It's the year 4000 BC, primitive doesn't even begin to describe the inhabitants of the earth. It's hard to differentiate between the cave man and the cave woman if it wasn't for...ummm, certain bits.

Fire is the "it" thing of the moment, followed closely by T-Rex earrings. After a hectic nights bonfire, the cave women are left to clean up whilst the cavemen attempt (again) to take down the neighbourhood woolie mammoth (unfortunately for the woolie mammoth nation, cavemen eventually get a little too good at doing this).

One cavewoman is put in charge of removing the charred logs and ash from the fire, which as you can imagine, is kinda messy. Whilst cleaning up, she pauses to rub her eyes a bit (all the dust is clearly annoying her) and turns to grunt something to some other cavewoman who is now looking at her all mesmerised and excited-like, gesturing wildly as if to ask, "What the heck is on your eyes, i love it!"

This would herald the birth of eyeshadow and eyeliner....and propel women throughout the ages to slap bright coloured, shimmery substances on their faces all in the name of looking good & looking different

Seriously though, i love makeup but its now getting too ridiculous:

- We now wear makeup so to look like we are not wearing make up.
- It's time consuming to get on, time consuming to get off.
- It's expensive (well the good stuff is...and we all want the good stuff).

In varsity, i knew a girl in my res who used to wake up a good 2 hours before her normal waking-up time just to get her face and hair did (i know this coz i was mesmerised by her flawless appearance everyday and just had to ask how she did it). As much as i scorn the utter ridiculousness of such actions, i can't help by admire this kind of dedication! I wish i had an ounce of such discipline, maybe then my hair would actually lie flat and behave, my skin looking flawless and my lips would be all rouged up.

Ahhhhhh, warried* for such things.....first off nothing eats into my sleep time...NOTHING. And secondly, a little makeup goes a long way but when you start looking:

a) nothing like your natural, former self;
b) like Ru Paul - enough said; and,
c) like Barbie's second cousin, twice removed.

It's time to put down the makeup brush ladies and take a well deserved makeup time-out...yah, i'm talking to YOU, lol :-)

*warried (origins = Zim slang, pronouced 'wah-reed'): Meaning - "Couldn't give a rat's a**" basically...oooh, and "apathy" would be another good word.

Errrr, What's up Doc?: Yesterday, South Africa's 3rd president, Kgalema Motlanthe, was sworn in. Can't help but laugh at the topsy turviness of it all. SA is mediating in Zim for Zim to get a new president and cabinet of ministers, and yet they are the ones who now have a new president and group of ministers....all in the space of like 5 days! Lets hope the current of change is northward bound too ":-)

Driving Miss Daisy: I hate, HATE driving my parents around. Now i know they've known me since the days I lacked any bladder and bowel control, but come on now, i've come a long way since then...i even have motor skills and all to show for it. I had the delightful task of driving my papa around on Heritage Day, eish...pressure times. I am a good driver, honest...but it felt like my driver's test all over again. Thankfully i didn't prang into anything, kill anyone or execute any illegal turns, and in all fairness, he was trying to look comfortable about it all...but eish, there won't be a repeat performance anytime soon.

Raul, Raul, Wherefore Art Thou Raul: I am soooooooooooooo jealous of my younger sister, freaking frolicking in Mexico as we speak with some hottie called Pedro (Spanish names just ooze the hotness sha)! Boo, i want to be knocking back tequila's, wearing a sambrero, looking for a hottie named Raul and annoying the locals with my broken Spanish too! If you are reading this little sis...i want my postcard

NB: I am super obsessed with postcards, if i provide a postal address - when i eventually setup my post box - will you all send me a postcard for my collection, i am more than happy to return the favour...holla back with feedback).

It's 11am and i already in weekend mode and i am in the mood for a large, refreshing Mojito...some dancing...more very own Raul/Pedro and some retail therapy!

Espero que tengas un buen fin de semana hombres! (Hope you have a good weekend!)

V x


ShonaVixen said...

hey V!!
So true whilst Zim's dilly-dallying on all that matters, South Africa just did it all!!!Is that to show why they are indeed mediating??LOL...

I will send you a post card once you're all set up let me know ne?
You also have a lovely weekend..m going to be spending mine with Zimbabweans..wish me

Bondgirl said...

new to your blog...but was lmao @ the chick getting up 2hrs earlier..!

Make up I love but like you love my damn sleep more so really waaaarried!!! for getting up way b4 I need to to look half decent

Vimbai said...

Shona: How did you weekend go? And i will def hook you up with my postal what-what so you can send me some purrrrrrrrrty postcards, yay!

Bondgirl: Firstly, i must confess at the age of like 6,all i wanted to be was a bondgirl. I watched Octopussy, and eish, it was over for me.

Thanks for dropping by hun, its great to know i'm not the only one who puts a high emphasis on sleep :-)