Monday, October 30, 2006

Clean Slate




"Today is gonna be the day that they gonna give it back to you
By now you should’ve somehow realised what you gotta do.

And all the roads we have to walk are winding,
And all the lights that lead the way are blinding"


It was while listening to Ryan Adam’s haunting rendition of Oasis’s “Wonderwall” that I realised I’d had enough….felt enough….hurt enough….just plain had enough. One of the most painful things I’ve had to learn this year is to let go….just…let go. Anyone who knows me well can tell you that I don’t let go of anything or anyone easily… I’m a compulsive hoarder, one of those people who can never let anything or anyone go, unless it’s absolutely necessary. A hoarder of clothes, books, emotions, people, useless information. But there is only so much storage space for such things. As the song goes, “by now you should’ve somehow realised what you gotta do”…and that’s where my epiphany comes in.

I think deep down I’ve always known what I’ve got to do…but like a lot of people, I silenced the voice of reason coz honestly, I didn’t wanna hear what it had to say there and then, but now I’m a little more open-minded .

Letting go…that’s my big lesson of the moment.

Letting go of obsolete dreams
Letting go of people
Letting go of preconceived notions
Letting go of resentment
Letting go of guilt
Letting go of regrets
Letting go of anger
Letting go of hurt
Letting go of situations that I cannot control
Letting go of unnecessary material possessions
Letting go…

Letting go of things that were taking up space in your life helps you recognise and hold onto the things and/or people who were making the world a more pleasant place. So I’m doing a bit of spring cleaning and hoping to begin with a clean slate…very liberating and quite scary, but oh so necessary.

"Twas more than I could take,
Pity for pities sake
Some nights kept me awake (I thought that I was stronger)
When you gonna realise
That you don’t even have to try any longer
Do what you wanna…

You’re gonna find yourself somewhere, somehow. "
Corrinne Bailey Rae

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Good on you girl! I never looked at it that way but you are right girl, you got stuff, people etc It has been such a part of you that I didnt even notice! Its always been cool coz if I need something I know I just have to go to your room and voila! Viva la change!